Ten minutes to write. Less time to read.

I have long since put away my lawn furniture; it rests snug and dry in the garage, waiting for my spring tulips to beckon. I have no need for it with four inches of Michigan’s finest snow covering everything.

But if I still lived in Chicago, it would be different. People in the Windy City use their lawn chairs all year long. I was reminded of this as I shoveled my front entrance and walkway this morning, and I promised myself to check the evening news for instances of lawn chair rage.

For the uninitiated, there is a rule in Chicago that goes like this: If I’m parked on a side street and snow falls, and I’m the one who shovels out my car and neatly clears the space it occupied, then I am entitled to have that space available when I return. I tell the world that the space is mine by putting a couple lawn chairs in it. And woe to the person who moves them.

Truthfully, this rule is not found in any City Council ordinances or police manuals. In fact, last year the Honorable Mayor Daley went on television to point this out after there had been several altercations over cleared parking spaces. He noted that people who moved someone else’s chairs to park their cars could not be ticketed or towed, as long as the shoveled space met all other parking regulations. You know, fire hydrants, loading zones, etc. This did not sit well with the shoveling lawn chair owners; short of taking matters into their own hands they had no legal leg – er, chair leg — to stand on.

Nevertheless, if I still lived in Chicago, I would respect the rule; and it has nothing to do with treating others as I would like to be treated. Rather, you never know if the person who set those chairs there is bigger and surlier than you. There are just some things you don’t mess with, and the lawn chair rule-that-is-really-only-a-tradition is definitely one of them.