?`s and ANNEswers

Ten minutes to write. Less time to read.

The Perfect Potato, Part II

So last night Earl and I sat down to dinner with a half-pound Russet potato each as the entre and some baked chicken as the side.  We knew what was riding on our taste buds.

The potatoes were beautiful, and even though “Cook’s Illustrated” said they didn’t need butter we added some. Blended it with the white inside which was definitely fluffier than how I usually bake potatoes. Every bite was consistently smooth, and the skin was definitely crispy without being crunchy.

It wasn’t that much extra work to follow the “Cook’s Illustrated” recipe, although I liked my old one just as well.  But the final decision was made by Earl, who isn’t much of a baked potato fan in the first place.

“Make them this way again,” he said. And because neither of us finished our potatoes he had leftovers today.  “Make them this way again,” he repeated.

“Cook’s Illustrated” wins.

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The Perfect Potato

I fancy myself a potato aficionado; my baking, roasting, and scalloping skills are well honed. But tonight, I’m trying something new.

I’m baking a Russet potato according to the two pages of intense analysis in the current issue of “Cook’s Illustrated.” If you subscribe to this publication, you already know that it takes any food and turns it into a scientific treatise complete with the item’s molecular structure, how it behaves under heat or cold, and the best way to achieve maximum taste. Some of this is more than I want to know.

Still, the potato article piqued my interest.  In a nutshell (which is a confusing idiom when we’re discussing potatoes), the Russet is the baker of choice.  One should not stab it with a knife, microwave it, or use the squeeze approach to check doneness.

Instead, the potato should be pricked gently with a fork, washed in a salt bath, and then put on a wire rack in a rimmed baking sheet for maximum air circulation around it. It should bake in a 450 degree oven until a meat thermometer registers precisely 205 degrees.

Next the potato is removed and brushed with oil before returning to the oven for another ten minutes. This is to insure a crispy skin and a fluffy inside. After the potato emerges for the last time, it is immediately – and this is really stressed in the article – slashed open by making a giant X across the top.  Salt and pepper complete the preparations. Butter is deemed unnecessary.

“Cook’s Illustrated” claimed to have baked 200 potatoes in various ways to achieve this final recipe. I, on the other hand, will make just two potatoes tonight and report soon. It is my duty as a self-proclaimed aficionado, because I wasn’t consulted for the article.

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Beethoven’s Birthday

Yesterday was the 245th anniversary of the birth of Beethoven, and Google honored him with one of its famous doodles.  This one showed an animated Beethoven taking some of his music to a concert hall.  Along the way he had a variety of mishaps that caused the sheet music to get eaten by a horse, blow into the wind, or get stuck in trees. The viewer then had to put the music back in its proper order.

I’ve studied the three pieces that were highlighted in this doodle, and as I clicked on a page of music and tried to put it in the proper place I realized that fifteen years of taking piano lessons has taught me much. Still I struggled with this assignment. After all, when I learn music I don’t have to decipher which measure comes first. With this doodle, I did.

Once I got the hang of it, the challenge became fun. And I revisited such classics as “Beethoven’s Fifth,” “Moonlight Sonata,” and “Ode to Joy.” It was joyful.

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Tips on Writing vs. Writing

I subscribe to a variety of publications, both online and off, about writing. And over the years, I’ve seen a shift in their focus. Today’s message is about ten ways to do this, five things not to do about that, how social media is important, and how your platform is essential.

The thing is: None of this advice relates to actually sitting down and writing. It’s more about promoting yourself and your work. It’s marketing disguised as writing.

I understand that promotion is at the heart of much these days.  Still, it makes me wonder. If writers are serious about writing, how do they find the time to do it if they’re reading all these tips about promoting their work and then following them?

I don’t have the answer.  But I’m working on it, because I’m all about writing while understanding that most of the world is about marketing.

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Non-News

I watched the NBC Nightly News this evening and was reminded why I rarely do so. There’s very little news and a lot of fluff.

The lead story was billed as a “war” between Donald Trump and Ted Cruz over the State of Iowa.  It seems Cruz is surging, whatever that means, in the polls there and The Donald isn’t happy.

So he called Cruz a maniac.  However, from the clips NBC showed, Cruz seemed to be minding his own business and rallying his team.  Not really what a maniac would do.  It made me wonder if Trump has a team, given he’s paying for his campaign himself.

Some announcer then said that there were about fifty days left before the Iowa Caucus, which leads me to believe more firmly that this story isn’t a story at all. Granted, it suggests the Republican Party is in disarray and that there will be a lot of infighting in the future. But that’s nothing new.

Call me cynical, but I suspect the real purpose of this news item was to promote the final GOP debate of the year which takes place tomorrow night.

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Crazy Weather

Earl and I often have some of our best conversations in the first few moments after we wake up.  This morning was no exception.

The weather here in southwestern Michigan has been balmy for the season.  Yesterday and today are both in the sixties; in fact, I saw three people at the mall wearing shorts.

The thing is Earl and I are taking a cruise in mid-January, so that he can leave behind icy roads, mounds of snow, and a collection of clothing to keep one warm. So far none of these conditions has occurred.

“Want to cancel the cruise,” I facetiously asked the big blob under the covers beside me.

There was no hesitation. “I’m going,” he answered.

It’s not like we can get our money back anyway, but I still would like some miserable weather between now and the time we leave.  Except on the day we’re supposed to fly to Florida to board the cruise ship.

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Ready Already

Christmas Day is thirteen days away, and I’m ready already.  I can’t remember the last time I had packages mailed, the tree trimmed, and the holiday menu planned in such record time.

At first I wondered what was wrong.  Then I wondered what I might have missed. Finally, I decided that part of the reason I’m ready ahead of schedule is that I deliberately cut back this year.

We purchased a pre-lit tree this time around, although I did add lights and ornaments to it. But it wasn’t the tree we normally trim, the one from the last century that wasn’t pre-lit and came in various pieces requiring assembly.

I didn’t display my snow people collection either; it’s not that I’ll never display them again, but I do like the simpler look. And since there are fewer people coming for Christmas Day dinner, the menu isn’t as extensive.  Funeral potatoes still made the cut, however.

So between now and Christmas Eve I plan to sit by the new tree, enjoy its lights, watch the fireplace flicker, and read.  Who could ask for a better way to get in the mood?

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Board Meeting

We live in a condominium, which means we also belong to a homeowners’ association (HOA). Which means there is an annual meeting where the HOA reports on what it’s done the past twelve months.

As a rule, these meetings are dry and end with disgruntled residents whining about some obscure issue. More often that not, it’s an issue they don’t want to help solve. They just want to complain.

Let it be known that the board of an HOA is a volunteer position, one that opens the board members to complaints and grumbles with no remuneration. And with a lot of expected tolerance.

Our annual meeting was held a couple days ago, and I acknowledge how skillfully it was handled. There were the usual reports from the various officers, and at the end there was little groaning and grumbling from the assembled homeowners.

I think this shows how well our board has communicated over the past twelve months.  This isn’t an earth-shattering moment. But then again it is.

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King-Sized

“Is so.”  “Is not,” Earl replied.

“Is so.”  Want to bet?” he asked.

“Sure,” I said. “The loser pays for dinner.”

Sometimes when dinner’s involved Earl backs down, not wanting to put that much money on his point of view.

“I’ll pick the Signature Room on the ninety-fifth floor of the Hancock Building in Chicago,” I said. I was sure of my facts. “I’ll pick the new Sonic restaurant,” he said.  “I drive by it every day and haven’t been there yet.” “That’s a hamburger chain,” I told him, as if he didn’t already know.

We got out of bed and did what we do to start each day: headed to our computers to check our lives. A few minutes later, Earl appeared in my office with documentation and a smile on his face.

A king-sized bed tops out at 6080 square inches of surface on which to roll around, sleep, or stretch.  A California king has only 6048 square inches. I had argued the Cali king was larger; he had disagreed.

I don’t mind losing a bet or paying to take Earl to Sonic. But I am disappointed the Signature Room isn’t in my future.

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Opening Lines

The Great Book Club met last night, and five of us discussed Mrs. Dalloway, a 1925 novel by Virginia Woolf.  It made me think about first sentences in novels.

I’m sure you remember “Call me Ishmael,” which is the start of Moby Dick.  And “It was a dark and story night,” which is the start of Paul Clifford, although this sentence has now degenerated to represent something trite and tedious.

For the record, the opening of Mrs. Dalloway is “Mrs. Dalloway said she would buy the flowers herself.” The sentence has been dissected and re-dissected ad nauseam.  Personally I put it in the Dark and Stormy Night category. So what openers have intrigued me lately?

How about this?  “Answer the door after midnight and you might as well set a place at the table for trouble.”  This is Jo-Ann Mapson’s Hank and Chloe.  Or this: “The thing is, all memory is fiction.” Find it in Robert Goolrick’s Heading Out to Wonderful. And finally, “This much is not in dispute.”  It’s the opening line to The Other Side of the River by Alex Kotlowitz.

Perhaps I’m fascinated by first sentences because I’m not good at them. I’m much better with closing lines. In this case, the three books from which I culled opening sentences are on my list as future recommendations to book club members.

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