“Oops, I forgot your toast,” the server said, as she laid the rest of our breakfast on the table. “Sorry about that.”
“Hey, our head chef didn’t come in to work today, and nobody else knows how to make poached eggs,” another server at another restaurant on another day said. “Sorry about that.”
“I didn’t see you,” said the man with an armful of groceries edging his way into the checkout counter in front of me. “Sorry about that.” I was wearing bright red that day.
“Sorry about that” has become the mantra for everybody who sees a slight error or problem that could otherwise be solved with a minimum of effort. It is used, not only in places where food is purchased (as my examples might suggest), but also in almost every other situation where something isn’t just quite right.
“Darn, I meant to return your book. Sorry about that.” “My dog accidentally pooped on your lawn. Sorry about that.” “I didn’t realize I was half an hour late to meet you. Sorry about that.”
This phrase is unapology at its best. The person using it doesn’t really have any sense of being truly sorry, which is appropriate, because true sorrow should be held for those situations where a real loss has occurred. A death or some other life changing family event. A loss of property or a job. Toast, poached eggs, and puppy poop don’t make the cut.
At the same time, you would never use “Sorry about that” to express heart-felt condolences or sympathy. It would mark the speaker as shallow and thoughtless. So I believe we could eliminate using those three words together and still have enough to say in any social situation.
Besides, it would be more appropriate to say something about a remedy rather than flip off a worn out excuse? How about: “Oops, I forgot your toast. I’ll be right back with it.” “Darn I meant to return your book. Let me send it to you.” “My dog accidentally pooped on your lawn, but I’ll take care of it.”
And for the man who stepped in front of me in the grocery line, how about, “Excuse me”?
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